On the other side of the mirror
http://www.livejournal.com/users/yanomamo/
im in the process of moving everything over here, please go there to see new posts/dreams!
i've said it before, I'll say it again, its amazing how things work out, a good conversation is often all it takes to fix some problems.
Friendship, its a funny thing.
I wonder about friendship sometimes.
I often get the feeling with people that I am putting more in than they are.
Now, I don't feel like I treat it like a competition,
but I have never been able to figure out why I always seem more interested in friendship than the other person.
There are times when I just feel like, what gives?
I haven't heard from this person in months,
despite how many times I've called or emailed them.
Why is it that I always try harder to maintain/have/keep a friendship?
I often wonder if I should try less,
if I should not care about a friendship so much.
Would my friends try harder, take up the slack?
or would a lot of my friendships just die off?
Apparently I'm not willing to find out yet.
because I haven't done it.
is there such thing as being too good of a friend?
So I think I need to retitle my blog as the dream depository... Here comes another one.
If you like action movies, or even just badass guy movies, where some person overcomes all of these different odds, where it seems impossible for them to come out on top, yeah... you're gonna like this one. I woke up this morning feeling manly, feeling hardcore, I wanted to fight, because compared to what I had been through last night in my dream, NOBODY could touch me, not even Kenan, i'd've been wiping the floor with him.
The dream starts out oddly, myself as a child, I am seeing the world as if I were looking at it through a first person perspective. i am a kid, and I am sliding down this snow covered hill, its an awesome hill, tons of fun, but the hill is about 200 feet long, and it has about a 50 foot decline, and then about 20 feet after the hill levels out there are just rows and rows of trees. Not a great spot for those trees, yet we keep going down the hill anyway, having fun, and then climbing back up it, to bash into the trees. The first time I slid I wasn't going fast enough to hit the trees, so while climbing back up I was trudging through the snow and making very litttle progress, kids were sliding down twice as many times as me. so eventually I got up high enough, and slid down again. This time, I walked on the side of our slide where there was no snow (no snow on a snow covered hill, the snow was only where we were sliding.) Slid down again, and the next time climbed all the way to the top.
*warning* I cannot tell if there were some sequences of me being in a car driving through a town and then outside the town to get to this hill, I distinctly remember being in the town before this and I cannot remember why otherwise, none of it makes sense in my head, so I have some previous knowledge of the routes of this town/city (fairly large, but all low level buildings). The city is very flashy, kind of like a toned down vegas without all the casino's.
Anyway, so I was a child, but when I climb to the top of the hill, I am an adolescent, a teenager, and there are other teenagers there, just leaning against a fence, watching the little kids, and sometimes sliding down themselves. This is still a VERY rural setting, their is a farming field behind us, but directly behind us before that is a dirt and gravel road, leading back to what looks like a house behind us, and off to the left. The main road is to our right, running parallel to this hill, but perpendicular to the gravel road. There is a much taller fence behind us, about 12 feet high it seemed, where the one we were leaning on was about 4 feet high, and had a wood beam along the top to lean on. Even though there was a door right behind me to lead through the twelve foor tall fence, I decided to climb over it, despite the warnings from the other kids. Before climbing over the fence, it had been getting dark, and there was this car that was shining its lights right at us, intentionally (I don't know why) but there was also activity of about three other cars back there. So when I jumped over the fence they came back. I don't remember really talking to the people, but I got in the truck and went with them to what I thought was this house.
Well, it was really a restaurant, and I just got a job. Its a little mom and pop run type of place, but they have several definetly non mom or pop people. So after working for a while, I get to talking with my co-workers and my bosses. I've been chatting with them a bit about company policy and some other odd stuff, and they decide to let me in on this shady business going on in the back. There is some type of drug dealing or otherwise illegal activity that I never really found out what it was, but it was highly guarded, protected, and secretive. So I got in my bosses car, with Nick and Jess sitting in the back. I don't know if Nick and Jess were working with me, or if they were other adolescents on the fence, but all of a sudden they were there, riding in the car with us to the back. So it was this one boss that was already involved, and us three new people that had never seen any of this before.
So you might be saying to yourself, "What the fuck, he promised us hardcore and this definetly doesn't seem like hardcore so far, this seems like pansy-ass shit!"
Well here it comes.
Driving along this back of the back dirt road, seeing tons of guys (mixed races, mostly non-white) all working, very non-descript activities that I couldn't really Identify. We pull up to this house with this guy standing out front with some type of fully loaded automatic machine gun. The boss has me roll down my window and talk to the guy. Apparently there has been some type of change in organization, and this 'boss' was not only no longer boss, but he was considered as good as dead. Before we even realized it, this guy was unloading a full clip into us, into this car. It was brutal, it had so much gore and horror that I cringed, I still cringe. Not only did I take 11 bullets, 7 or so of which all going into my left leg after going through the door of the car. Enough going into Jess and Nick to kill them both, and some making it past me to hit the driver. I felt the physical change in my body. Pain everywhere, my breathing changed, my movements changed. I was going to slowly die, I was pretty much already dead, done for. Thats what went through my head. Somehow Nick was dead nearly instantly, but Jess wasn't. Her last dying words to me were some of the saddest things I had ever heard. I doesn't even matter what they were, its one of those last-dying-words-of-huge-significance-and-meaning scenes, it was sad, tragic, and beautiful all at the same time. I was the last thing I heard. And then I believed I was dead.
But something rose up within me, it wouldn't let me die, my time wasn't now, nothing about me was going to quit. After the quick panic of the shooting, Jess's dying words, and me thinking I'm dead. I realized I actually wasn't dead, and I was just hurt, wounded, injured, but alive. The stinging pain angered me, the dying words of Jess angered me, someone had killed two of my closest friends. I jolted the drive out of shock, as I had taken most of the bullets, he had only minor injuries comparatively and was able to drive off. This all occured in the time it took for the shooter to run in, get another clip of bullets, and load it, and before he could come back out, we were driving off.
Careening through the town, speeding to save our lives, trying to get to the hospital, that was our sole goal. Wouldn't you guess it, we ran into a traffic jam. I'm sitting there with eleven bullets in me, AND THERE IS A FUCKING TRAFFIC JAM, (even on a regular basis you there are a couple things that really piss me off about driving. 1. bad drivers. 2. red lights. and brake lightes on peoples cars, also red. and 3. TRAFFIC!!!) So I was thoroughly pissed off. So I got out of the car and started yelling at the Police officer that was nearby. Litterally nearly screaming how there were two dead people in the back of this car, and we had to get some medical help to myself and the other guy immediately. The guy looked at me dumbfounded, he had never seen a man with 11 bullets in him walking before. He put in a car for help, but his car was stuck and he couldn't move. Another lady nearby yelled to the policeman said that she worked at the hospital and she could run me there as she was on her way to work and knew a way there around the traffic jam. so the policeman helped me over to her car (some kind of mid-sized suv like a four runner) and they both got me into the back/trunk area. I was getting squished between the back seats and them trying to close the door, for some reason, it was very difficult as they had to move most of my limbs for me in getting me to fit, and as soon as the two of them get me in there, we take off. Apparently the driver went with the cop. I don't really know what happened, maybe the underground network that shot us caught up to him and killed him. As for me, my fate looked to be far worse than death.
This lady starts driving and I go unconscious because this is the first time I feel safe and can relax after being in a great state of shock. I wake up and somehow manage to climb over the back seat to realize where we were, and that we were not on our way to the hospital. I said "Hey this isn't the way to the hospital!" and she replied something about how she worked for the same organization and she was 'planted' at the traffic jam to intercept me getting to the hospital and she was going to kill me. Well was I just gonna sit around and let this happen, FUCK NO! after all of the shit I had been through already and survived, this ruthless bitch wasn't going to kill me. She was driving me out to a remote location to kill me. So I mustered up all of the strength that I had, and I started pushing her head against the driver side window with my right leg. She was fighting back but not too hard, because she was driving on the freeway as well. I got her head well pressed up against the window, and then started letting a little space come back, letting her head away form the window, so I could repeatedly extend my leg fully, and bash her fucking skull against the glass. then she really started fighting back, she punched my left leg where the seven bullets were, obviously that hurt like all hell. I had to use my hands, although my right arm nearly usuless, torn by bullets, I had to punch with my left hand, and control her by her hair or limbs, and then be kicking her with my right leg. this fearsome struggle left the car to smash into the barrier in the middle of the free, slowly causing the car to come to a stop; but not before sending her through the side window, out onto the concrete, and sent me, smashing against the front windshield, causing it to do that spiderweb-looking cracking effect, and left me lying inside the car.
Came back to consciousness yet again, got out of the car. For some reason there was no one around, no cars when we were driving on the freeway, and no cars there now, not even a policeman behind this accident. So I got out, and found this lady lying on the pavement still alive, but struggling to keep that life in her. I got a couple good blows in, not that it was much use besides venting my anger, got back in the car, and backed up a ways so I could drive over the bitch's corpse before driving off. I set my course back to that fucking hospital and there wasn't nothin gonna stop my this time, flooring down the freeway, back into town, still losing some blood, still in excrutiating pain, flying down at about 120, or as fast as this car could go. Got back into town, and got to the hospital this time, traffic jam free. After the encounter with the bitch, I knew that the underground force was going to have more than one precaution to make sure that I was dead, by this time, I was sure the ex-boss I was with met his maker. I knew their next easy place to cut me off was at the hospital, so I couldn't just waltz into the emergency room expecting nothing, and there was no way I was going to make it to another town (like in this universe, this was the only town, and there was only one hospital). So I didn't go into the emergency room entrance, didn't go into the front door entrance, but I went in through the employee door. I had to get some help or I too was done for soon. I went into where they check in, snuck past the main entrance, and found a counter where a man was talking to a woman. I just yelled out, excuse me i've got eleven fucking bullets in me and I need some help. And the guy replies "that's impossible, you couldn't be alive or standing now. So I just pulled up my pants to show him the area around my thigh and knee, where seven of the bullets were concentrated and protruding through the skin. Apparently, the reason I was able to still be alive now, is when I was getting shot, the bullets had to go through the door of the car first to hit me, this caused them to slow down enough so when they went into the flesh and muscle, they couldn't break the bone, or go all the way through, so there were 7 entry wounds on my leg, and you could still see the bullets part way in there by looking, but there were no exit wound. 11 entry wounds, no exit wounds; I had 11 bullets lodged in my body. The hospital worker just responded with shock and rushed to get three doctors to help me right away. So I got past the killer at the hospital, but I knew they were still there, and now I knew they knew that I was there, and that meant that they were coming for me. So I was finally sitting there, laying in a bed, with some hardcore drugs in me, nothing making me sedated, but definite morphine, as well as a blood IV to make up for all of what was lost. The operation was a blurr up until that point, of waking up there, fairly safe, with more stitches then fucking frankenstein, and just thinking, I know they are coming for me. And without fail, in they come. Somehow I recognized one of them as the man who was put at the hospital to kill me, he came in with his boss, and his right hand man. They just started talking to me, like "You didn't really think you could get away did you? I'm quite impressed that you killed our agent in the process, but we just can't let you live. What were you thinking getting involved? We can't let you expose us." I know its coming, a knife, a silenced gun, a needle or something. I knew I couldn't take on all three of them, especially in that condition.
So what happens? My savior enters the room, and SHE doesn't just enter the room, she comes in with a flying kick, knocking the killer out cold instantly. And there were two, I grabbed one of the tools next to me, Thrust it with all my might into the hand of the distracted boss, it went through his hand, and partway into the arm rest that he had his hand on. I then kicked him away, ripping this scalpel like knife through the rest of his hand, and it came out through his joints. The scream of agony was fullfilling. The other man turned to face my savior KUMIKO!!!! who was already pulling off the most amazing martial arts moves I had ever seen against this goliath of a right-hand man. I purposefully pulled myself out of my bed, dragged the IV's with me, and crawled over to the boss, clenching his hand on the floor, bleeding everywhere. I extracted my revenge. Pulled myself on top of him, and after a couple good hits, choked him to death with my left hand. I don't think I had ever had more rage, then that clenched fist, it felt as if my hand were going to break with the tension.
And then I woke up.
A picture is worth a thousand words. Is it really a thousand? is it exactly a thousand? Did someone take all of the movies that were based on books, and see how many pictures were in the movie compared to how many words there are in a book? If that's the case, it seems like a picture would be worth far less than a thousand words, and a picture maybe worth even less than one word. Someone should do that study. Anyway, on to why I'm really posting.
My dreams, better than movies and video games combined. They have no limits, anything can happen in the absolute sense. I can be any different character, from various different positions "think camera angles, or perspectives". I can be anywhere, in places that don't exist mostly, I can be in any time, any existence, any plane of possibility. My dreams often involve people that are familiar to me, that I know exactly who they are, or there could be a bunch of non-human type things, and I'm just watching them. What I'm saying is, I've had dreams that I thought I could make into movies or video games, but I am very poor at expressing them in an existing medium, such as words, or pictures. I am really hoping to take art classes, because my "untrained hand" is just not cutting it at this point. And what is making me write all this? Another one, a monster, an epic, more vivid than I have had in a long time, more detailed, specific, elaborate, inventive.
The beginning is blurry as they always are, because when you are sleeping your brain can only hold so much information in short term memory, because you are asleep all of this is subconscious.
The beginning is blurry, I think I was in some sort of village, I had a companion, that was very similar to me, for some reason throughout the whole dream I cannot truly remember if we were human or not. I think so, because I saw and interacted with other people that were human, that were recognizable to me. But they were not the same, not only was everyone shorter, but we had different capabilities than humans today, signifying possible past or future setting. The setting of time never really came into place. I saw into the past once, I saw an epic war, it was being fought with melee weapons, and sorcerers. Sorcerers exist in this time too. That's why I'm calling it an epic, it had many of the elements that any classic epic would have; maybe I was listening to too much Lord of the Rings soundtrack last night. So its the village that we start out in, we are inside one of the buildings, talking with someone, it is important, he is a very magical being. I cannot remember what he looks like at all, but he is much taller than us, and he has something very important for us to do. (Another aspect of epics, when a really important or powerful person needs something done very, very badly, he always sends someone else) We accept his quest, because otherwise it would be a fucking boring as hell dream. We adventure, and this is where details come into play.
We have to get to a specific room very high up in a mountain nearby, in this room, there is a secret portal that is very heavily guarded because it takes us to some sort of holy city/place of great plot significance. We start venturing up the mountain, and we find another man with a small group who has been ambushed (classic opening). We quickly rush up to help defend him, regardless of knowing who is good or evil, (the good main characters always help unknown bystanders who are under attack). This man is a great warrior, but his party is not, the others looked like little helpers, people assisting him, but were not reliable for more than carrying things and being of other general aid. We greeted the man after the attackers were all dead, and he thanked us for our help. We talked for a short while of how we had to get up this mountain, as he was heading the same way, we more or less joined forces, even though we had a different goal. The mountain was very solid and hard, like there was no grass or topsoil, it was all just solid ground (like you would expect in a video game) there was no instances of the ground moving, changing, or crumbling away, it was just there; the color of an odd red, not blood, not quite rust, but it was just an eerie speckled red. When walking up the mountain, it was like the path was cut out for us, there was no other way to go, not possible at all. There was a roof above us, not always flat, but always there, a wall to our right, an opening to our left, it was like a tube dug out from the side of this mountain. And then came the obstacles. The tunnel was restrictive so there could be obstacles in our way, making it difficult to proceed, testing our agility, as well as potential to bend time and/or space. I definetly remember these things altering for short periods of time so we could get around these boulders in the way. They came though, on after another, some we could just climb over, other times we had to jump around (the bending of time and/or space) There was one that stands out in my mind, because on the other side there was an archer, not someone that was against us, but he was just there. During our interchange he did not want us to pass, warned us of some danger ahead, but part way through it, he slipped, and being very near the edge already, fell of the side and died (I never saw him again). We continued on, the three of us, my companion who was very much like me and the man we befriended, and soon enough came to a large door. These doors were amazing. It seemed that they were elaborately carved metal, they were definetly made out of some sort of ore and had unbreakable glass panes in them, also very elaborate in picture, detail, and design. They were amazing. We could see in very little, although it looked amazing as well. Well, somehow we got these doors open by no use of brute force. And there it was, this amazing room, in front of us stood a couple of statues, the guards of the room. Apparently we had some sort of higher permission to be in the room, because the guards did not come alive and attack us. There were five of them, one great large one, that looked sort of like an elephant, but it had more like hands then two pairs of feet, I do distinctly remember a trunk-like object on his face, and he was heavily armored, spikes on his shoulders, hard plating, it was so giant it needed no weapon. It appeared to be probably 35 times my own size. Then there was a warrior straight in front of me, a very tall muscular being with a hidden face. He/it had on steel plating with elaborate carvings, much like the doors did, and held in both of his hands, a great sword straight up and down, it was parallel with his body going straight up into the sky (you've seen the pose if you play any games or have seen any sci-fantasy movies at all) He had powerful arms and legs, not that we could see most of his muscles, but just the bulky size of this creature under the plated armor was amazing. And he wore a very awe-inspiring helmet, it made one fear for their life. I cannot remember the third defender, but the fourth and fifth were two small winged creatures that stood on pedestals, on the sides of the room, surrounded by glass (it made sense that they would wake up and attack when the glass was broken.) The gentleman we were with had a crossbow as well as a sword, he was a very dark figure, black and mysterious, however he was obviously on our side. The room had many books, it seemed to be filled with ancient knowledge that was highly guarded by whoever it was that sent us, and whatever group of people he belonged to. (Everyone belongs to some group of people!) It had tables and chairs in the middle, with lamps, there were inscriptions on the floor, and near the back wall, that was where we knew we had to be. Once we crossed over to this certain point, we knew that the portal would be activated. The portal took time to actually transport us to wherever it was we needed to be transported. After we had stepped across, a transparent film went up, surrounding us and our side of the room, so we could see into the other side, and it was even penetrable, but it still provided for some sort of separation for what was being transported. Almost as instantly as it went up, people burst into the doors, a group of badguys, skilled fighters, and quite a lot of them, but obviously led by one main man. And the statues became alive, it was amazing, the crumbling away of stone, an instant stop on the ground by the huge elephant-type thing (as a statue, it was posed as standing on one back leg, imagine a horse rearing) and the fighter just started out swinging. There were so many of them, the fighter seemed to be taking hits, but with his armor brushing them off, but for some reason, it seemed as if the elephant character did not have very strong skin, and was quickly defeated by the amassing enemies, although it had definetly done its damage. Once we saw the elephant dying, and the fighter being overpowered, our friend took out his crossbow, and shot the two small glass cages, the winged creatures woke up, and started leisurely making their way (walking) over to where the fight was taking place, the seemed pissed and thoroughly evil, but they didn't walk the walk so to speak. However, soon after they were release, another group of men came through and attacked the first group, whom had seriously been weakened in numbers, were not able to last long, it seemed as if the fighter had fallen alongside the elephant as he was no longer able to be seen, and the last thing we saw before being teleported was the leader of the bad-guy group making his last few swings, before being repeatedly stabbed, yet he slashed on, he was cut so many times and in so many places, and finally he fell, and we were gone.
Chapter 2--- (you may be saying wtf? or jesus chris this is long! or, what he's writing this in chapters? how many fucking chapters is it? (I'd say this is the halfway point))
We got through the portal, and we were in an unfamiliar place, we just appeared here, but we knew we were safe. Before even being really able to gather ourselves and check the place out, we were greeted by a man, very similar to the one who put us on this quest (I told you he was part of a group!). He and several other people/creatures (they were all very different but had similar aspects, like different races of beings.) with him, and they all approached us as well. It was an interaction of not only congratulations but of challenges to come, things that were in front of us. It was a briefing of where we had to go, and what we had to do. The place we were in was a very open location, not discernibly outside or inside, it was built of stone, very bizarre architecture with half-walls and large pieces of stone lying about, it looked as if it were recently under siege and took some heavy damage. The place looked like an artifact, an antique, very old and precious, but nevertheless sturdy and lasting. We did rest and relax for a while, and then the only discernible character in the entire dream showed up. (I really wish I could have people guess at this point WHO the character is, so if you want to, be my guest, ill separate the next few lines.)
So after resting for a while, and chatting with some of the people nearby, props if you guessed it, my dad showed up. Looked exactly like him, a little shorter like everyone else, but just as I would imagine him generally. And boy was he stereotypical. He was trying to give me advice which was overall negative, he was disappointed that I wasn't doing better, but displayed slight signs of being proud for what I had done. This seemed to last a long time with me tuning out a lot of what he was saying, it was frightfully realistic. Sooner after realizing my dad was there, I was pretty quick to get the fuck out. The one dark companion we had met on the mountain had decided to stay or something, as when my companion and I left, he did not come with us. This time the journey was much shorter, but it was much more perilous and challenging. This time we had attackers, to get from where we were to where we needed to go, we had to cross through a type of city that was mostly houses surrounding this one type of castle or keep in the middle, it was a giant block that went up into the sky. It seemed as if we had moved (the portal took us) higher up the mountain, and it just kept going up and up, but it had been made into an actual building. You could see that this building was easily the top, although it was rather large, and I can't recall being able to see the top of it. Traveling through the town, more of our abilities were seen. We were great jumpers, and could leap from building-top to building-top, stealthily. Like I said before there were attackers everywhere, and they weren't just trying to attack us, they were all trying to get into this building that we were trying to get into, but they were also ravaging the village on the way there. The town was made-up mostly of smaller little shack-like houses, cheap corrugated tin roofs and sides, they appeared to be one room buildings, often with a lot of personal possessions outside as no one had room inside to keep them. There were quite a few little awnings and whatnot. So we were stealthily moving about the town and we were getting closer and closer, we made it to the back of the huge building that we had to get inside, and so we had to go around to get to the front. This is where the concentration of the most badguys were, they looked like ghouls that had claws and overall fairly menacing and just attacking the buildings. I could not see any peasants left in the buildings or surrounding area, either they were all dead or evacuated some time ago. We had to be even more careful, as jumping from the rooftops made noise and we couldn't be seen. We were doing alright, and we were getting close, and then we were spotted. This ghoul let out a horrible cowl, alerting the others of our presence, we just started booking it, leaping from rooftop to rooftop, hoping to make a getaway, we could see them climbing up the buildings and running behind us, as well as finding ways to get in front of us, forcing us to leap higher and longer to get away. All of a sudden a some arrows started coming our way, it was our only support as we were coming into the front gate. They were taking a huge risk, holding the gate open, trying to defend it to let us get in, the ghouls were swarming every. We had been traveling in a counterclockwise manner (if you were looking from the top of the mountain) and so we turned to the left and saw amazing white standing pillars, with ample space for defending archers along a raised walkway. The doors were also a similar white, although more gray, and just as elaborate and decorative as the first room we had walked in. It seemed to be more of the magical symbols that we had seen before. It was like salvation, seeing the doors open, guards at the sides with great pikes, ready to retreat as soon as we made it in. We rush through the doors, gasping for breath, seeing the light dim behind us as the clouded sky slowly disappeared behind the giant, closing doors. I think this was the place we were supposed to reach from the original quest, I believe that there is some item in that place that I was supposed to retrieve. A lot of what happened in the immediate future here is also a little blurry. I remember talking to some of the elders in this large building, and there were others that needed to talk to me, about what was going on, and the item I was pursuing. One of the people I talked to showed me the past, it was one of those displays where they touch you, and you are able to see what happened. I saw a great war, massive amounts of people running towards each other and then a clash in the middle. There were no shields just offensive weapons, and creatures that just seemed expendable. Behind the grunt forces were the wizards, casting spells against the other side, it was all offense, all destruction, no defense or preservation whatsoever, it was just one big mass slaughter. It was one of the oddest sights to see, keep feeling it was representative of something although I don't know what. After this, I remember small episodes of venturing out into the town again, without fighters, on a rescue mission to save someone who was under attack, I don't remember how well that went but we made it back safe. I also saw another man run into the castle taking the same route I did, but he was able to go much faster and jump farther.
I would have loved to continue the dream, but unfortunately everybody has to wake up, well, except for the dead. I find this ironic, because it seems like I have these greats dreams in the mornings, like when my body is kind of waking up and getting ready for the day, but I am still actually sleeping. This is especially frustrating with these long dreams because my body is waking up so I rarely get to the end of the dream before I wake up. I know there is more there in this dream, and I wish I knew what happened to the end. My only chance of this ever happening is if this dream becomes a recurring one of mine (which I have quite a few of) and I get later into the dream, somewhere later in life. Well I hope you liked it, I'm impressed that you read through the dream, "The Epic"
Song playing in my head almost the entire time. Into the West from the Return of the King soundtrack.
I call it the weakness,
its kind of like a sickness,
in that it is consuming, enveloping, overpowering.
I can't control it, but it sure as hell controls me,
it does what it wants, without regard for what is right.
I hate it.
It is my like my worst fear, and the worst reality at the same time.
As my as I try to make it go away, I seem unable.
What do I need?
What is the solution? where is the fix, the antidote, the cure?
This among other problems...
I'd be satisfied living in a van, down by the river, because its cheap. If only there were some empty cabin across the puget sound for me.
I've said the phrase "fuck jesus" and I still don't believe in hell... maybe I should go see the passion.
posts to come soon for now, a great song.
When you walk through the storm
Hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark
At the end of the storm
There's a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of the lark
Walk on, through the wind
Walk on, through the rain
Though your dreams be tossed and blown
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone
You'll never walk alone
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone
You'll never walk alone
1 year
1 month
1 week
3 days
1 hour
